Welcome to America! Watch out for the terrorists!

Ok, so first of all, this is the first blog I have ever written in mid-air. I mean, I am on the internet right now! hard to believe! Anyways…

Atlanta airport was a trip! My gate was full of characters: soldiers returning from Iraq, a dude with a crazier beard than mine who might very well be a member of the Avett Brothers, a nun, and the likes. Sitting there waiting for my connection to Nashville, they kept coming over the speakers saying we are “on high terror alert” and it is all the way at “orange”, whatever the heck that means. I was smacked in the face with the reminder of fear people live in here. And then the second blow came when the lady beside me got a phone call from her husband.

Lady, “…yeah, and God! There are two terrorists or something on my flight! (pause) No, I don’t know what they are. They are draped in this orange shit, wrapped all around them!”

They were Buddhist monks. Yep.

She continued to talk and I considered moving, but the gate was full. Sigh. When she got off the phone I guess she thought I looked like an expert in the field and she turned to me and asked, “What Nationality are they?!” Referring to the monks. I said, “Well, I really have no idea but possibly Tibetan, or Burmese. They’re Buddhist monks.”

Lady, “But they’re wrapped in orange material! I’ve never seen that!”

Instead of telling her she should get out more, I just settled for the more polite, “Yeah, they tend to wear orange.”

Lady, “But why would they be going to Nashville?!”

Sigh again. Me, “Um, I really have no idea. But they probably have friends there,” to which the ladies eyes almost popped out of her head, “Or they might even live there. I don’t live far from Nashville and I’ve got Buddhist monk friends.”

Lady, “Oh my!”

Thankfully they called the first class passengers and the lady jumped up to board. Shew! Maybe she thought the orange level or terror meant the terrorists literally drape themselves in orange material. I don’t know. But it was pretty hectic.

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4 Responses to Welcome to America! Watch out for the terrorists!

  1. Laura Collura says:

    You are even funnier writing from USA. Come back soon!

  2. wanga says:

    Ryan this is hilarious! I can just see you sighing and trying to hide your disbelief at the level of ignorance!

  3. Hailey says:

    Such ignorance! Yes, a lot of people tend to live in fear about far too many things. I saw you at His People years back while I was on a missions trip. I live in Australia and love reading your blogs. Now it’s interesting as I can read and learn about South Africa and the USA.

  4. Malcolm says:

    Its just funny how ignorance can cause people to hide under multiple layers of “protection”. I guess, eventually you’ll be able to convince enough Americans, that we dont have lions roaming the streets, nor do we still wear loin cloths to school. Such fun. Missing you dude.

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