Usually when people say that phrase they are referring to a negative occurence of some sort. Um, yeah.
So… I got a random email a couple of weeks ago from an events management company, asking me to write an original happy birthday rap song for a certain, fairly well-known and pretty rich, individual (who’s name I cannot disclose due to confidentiality agreements). The email had the subject “Seychelles booking Ryan” and purely said,
I worked with you on (another nameless guy’s) 60th birthday. You did a happy bday song.
I want to use you for something similar in Seychelles. You fly on 13 sept and return on 18 sept.
Whats your cell no?”
My brain took off! Seychelles? A week? WHAT?! And yes, just so you know I performed a rap at another dude’s 60th birthday party back in January, but that’s besides the point. So I emailed the guy my number and he called me almost immediately. He told me who the client was, said it would be an all inclusive week in Seychelles, and I just had to perform the one original track, one time, the night of the client’s party. And they would pay me on top of that. The rest of the week I am free to enjoy the exotic tropical island. That is crazy!
For several reasons! I need money. I have been saying for a loooooooooooooong time how I “need a vacation at a place with a hot sun, warm water and white sands”. Um, and yeah, it is pretty much just totally random and crazy. No need for further reasoning! I confirmed the job, signed the contracts, and wrote the birthday rap. Could it be true that I am actually getting paid to go on a week long, all inclusive vacation on a tropical island? This is too good to be true!
Today was the day. I went to the airport, very early because there was no way I was going to miss that flight! I checked in, drank some smoothies with my wife, and then finally decided just to go on back to my gate. We said goodbye. She headed out the door and I headed towards the security check point. As my phone was passing through the x-ray machine it started ringing. I could not answer it and it went to voice mail. After I successfully passed through the security check point I checked my voice mail.
There was a message from the events manager guy asking me to urgently call him back. Uh oh!
I called him back. He gave me the bad news: the birthday boy is no longer coming to the Seychelles for the party! I could not believe my ears!!
Then I thought I had literally lost my hearing, or my brain, when he said,
“But don’t worry, you will still get paid. And you are still welcome to come on through and spend a week in Seychelles all expenses paid, but we understand if you have other stuff to do. You will get paid either way.”
Deep sigh. I guess I will just have to go. Well isn’t that just the way things work! My 2% business 98% holiday trip just turned into a 100%, all expenses paid, PAYING vacation! That’s just my luck!
You are allowed to swear at me now.